I used to think that I would always be the city girl, living in KL with all the bustling and busy life. After finishing my first degree, not wanting to do my double degree, just yet, I did a few odd jobs here and there. With two of my friends we rented one small apartment. I was working as an editor at that time ... not any editor, editor for one publication editing questions for workbooks. Workbooks for SRP and SPM students. It was no fun.

With a few hundred RM to live by, life was not that easy. I was feeling so lonely and the loneliness was eating me up from inside. My day started at 6.00 and I had to catch the sardine-packed mini bus. The job was not challenging enough for me, I dozed off most of the time. Had to sit at the table from 9-00 to 6-00. There were not many staffs. There was one other girl and I was working under one lady. The job was not for me. After work, I would always drop by at Section 14 PJ walking around aimlessly not wanting to go back to the apartment and face the wall. We had no tv and I had no proper bed. I would read some books and magazines and stare at the wall. My two other housemate were not getting along very well with each other, and one of them was getting married. She was my good friend, and the marriage was so depressing for me. I felt like I was loosing my best friend. Unlike men, once your girlfriends get married, the relationship would somehow start to change. You dont hang around as much and she can never be available as much as you want her to be.

I was suffocated by my life. Lonely and not knowing how to lead my life. Only then I went back to campus and finished my double degree. My lecturer suggested me to go back home and did my practical in my own hometown before going back to KL. Because , he said, once youre back and start working in KL, you would be very busy and you would have not much time for your parents. "Go back now and do your practical there and cherish your time with your parents. Then come back to KL and work like crazy... "

But I never went back.......................................