First Love

Everyone has a first love story to tell.

Mine happened when I was about 12. He stayed just a few houses away from mine. Though not from the same school, we went to the same tuition. I was a bit tomboy then and was always in pants. Never really believed that somebody would be attaracted to me. But he did, the boy who was fair, soft spoken, sweet face with some freckles, smart and everything a first love should be; naive and honest and never pretentious.

He and I would walk together after tuition and we would have the longest phone call at nite chatting and talking away as if nothing else mattered. We talked about everything, school and friends; only to be disturbed by his mother calling for him to help her with his small brothers. I did all the talking most of the time and he just listened.

Saya suka dengar kamu cerita

We went out once and I had to lie to my parents for that. It was a nervous experience for me, feeling very uneasy and afraid that we might be caught by my parents, friends and teachers. I had to even ask him not to sit next to me in the bus.

Nanti atas bas, kita jangan duduk sebelah sebelah lah,
kamu duduk kat belakang

and he being the person he was, just followed my suggestion.

Oh we both did well in school but I just had to borrow his notes somehow. I can never forget the time he lent me his history notebook only to find at the back of the page, colors of drawing of sweet hearts with "I Love You, Ann" in the middle. I was in cloud nine for months.

On my birthday he gave me a huge gigantic birthday card to show how much he loved me. For a boy his age, he was indeed romantic and sweet.

Our parents were not really happy with our situation. It was still a "no-no" for kids at that time to experience the boy-girl love relationship. His father had to come and discuss with my father for us not to be in contact anymore, but we managed to survive the resistants from our parents, quite a few times. We were both determined to proceed with our young and sweet relationship.

After sometimes, we somehow started to fade away from each other's life. I didn't really remember how it ended but I found out after the break up that he had another girlfriend. I knew the girl and I could say that the girl had some resemblance with me .

A few years later, I heard from a friend who heard from her mother, that both of our parents (mine and his) had to get some holy water from some Ustaz to make us forget one another. I didnt know how true the story was. I never asked my mom.

We didnt keep in touch after the episode. I knew that he went to US for his degree and I went on to meet other people. I heard that he got married when in US. I saw him a few years back at the Mosque on Hari Raya but I never saw his family .................... until recently. My sister called me to check on one blog and I did. After all these years I could still tell from the photos in the blog that its him. Happily married with four beautiful kids and a wonderful wife. He is doing very well and they are now staying outside Malaysia.

I read the wife's stories, their life together, how they met and everything, and I can say that its the same old him, sweet, shy, humble, smart. Reluctantly, I have to admit that there's a tinge of envy inside of me from reading their stories. There's even a big "What if....." somewhere there.

But I know, it was never meant to be for me and him. Like all other first loves, it had to end somehow, even without the holy water.

I know he is happy now and I am too for him. The wife is lucky indeed.