I have yet to confirm my suspicion of the ADD by diagnosis. I feel weird writing this as I have never known anything to be different with me because I ve been living ME all these years and I thought, I was well... 'normal'. The term ADD too was never in my vocabulary and if not for my bf, I wouldnt know it a all.
I knew my bf was always complaining about me not listening to him. He said I never listen whenever he was saying anything or talking to me. I didnt know what to explain to him but I do notice that sometimes my mind just sort of drift away during a conversation. Because of my poor concentration and lack of focus, I would always miss some parts of the conversation . I ve checked with Nora about this too and she admits that it hurts her sometimes because whenever she was telling me anything I looked very disinterested and as if my mind was somewhere else.
Inattention by not really listening and focusing is one of the many symptoms of ADD. There a lot of other instances and symptoms like procrastination, zoning out, starting multiple tasks but never completing anyone of them, constant worrying, inability to prioritize task, easily bored, esily distracted, forgetful etc etc. And because of all these symptoms, people with ADD have always been misunderstood. To certain extent it affects relationships with other persons.
Now I understand the reason why I have to read and reread certain page of a book, because my mind just can't focus because it keeps on wandering. I know for a fact about this because I really have to struggle to read the first few pages of a novel. If I manage to pass through the first chapter and if I find the first chapter interesting, only then I can finish the book. You see, the only thing that can make an ADD person to finish anything, it has to be of interest to them.
There are times during a movie when I would suddenly be at a lost that I would have to ask Nora what certain scene was all about, even when you can see that my eyes were fixed on the screen. According to Nora too, and to her annoyance, whenever we are watching a movie, I would suddenly get up and do other things not related to the movie watching (like getting a drink or snacks for the movie). I would for instance go and read a magazine or wash the dishes.
There is an endless list of all my odd actions and behavior which now I find the answers in ADD. It scares me but at the same time I wonder how in the world I got to be where I am today with the ADD.
I knew my bf was always complaining about me not listening to him. He said I never listen whenever he was saying anything or talking to me. I didnt know what to explain to him but I do notice that sometimes my mind just sort of drift away during a conversation. Because of my poor concentration and lack of focus, I would always miss some parts of the conversation . I ve checked with Nora about this too and she admits that it hurts her sometimes because whenever she was telling me anything I looked very disinterested and as if my mind was somewhere else.
Inattention by not really listening and focusing is one of the many symptoms of ADD. There a lot of other instances and symptoms like procrastination, zoning out, starting multiple tasks but never completing anyone of them, constant worrying, inability to prioritize task, easily bored, esily distracted, forgetful etc etc. And because of all these symptoms, people with ADD have always been misunderstood. To certain extent it affects relationships with other persons.
Now I understand the reason why I have to read and reread certain page of a book, because my mind just can't focus because it keeps on wandering. I know for a fact about this because I really have to struggle to read the first few pages of a novel. If I manage to pass through the first chapter and if I find the first chapter interesting, only then I can finish the book. You see, the only thing that can make an ADD person to finish anything, it has to be of interest to them.
There are times during a movie when I would suddenly be at a lost that I would have to ask Nora what certain scene was all about, even when you can see that my eyes were fixed on the screen. According to Nora too, and to her annoyance, whenever we are watching a movie, I would suddenly get up and do other things not related to the movie watching (like getting a drink or snacks for the movie). I would for instance go and read a magazine or wash the dishes.
There is an endless list of all my odd actions and behavior which now I find the answers in ADD. It scares me but at the same time I wonder how in the world I got to be where I am today with the ADD.
I suppose I have always been under HIS wings with HIS Rahmah and Rahim and the duas of my parents.........
2 comments:
by definition (from what you wrote) then I suppose I am an ADD too.... except for the constant worrying. but i wouldn't worry about it. humans are unique, and each individual are unique. if i had an ADD, so what? i don't need any sort of medical nonsense (read: advice and drugs) for it. i know it sounds arroganish, but really, think about it, if you were diagnosed with ADD or whatever fancy term they put on certain behaviour of any one person, if it doesn't harm others not ourselves nor it is evil, i think we're pretty much okay. ijul.
Haha..Ijul ya I get your point and I can see where ure coming. Many ADDers do not even know they are one until they start having problems with relationship and at work. Because of my unfinished tasks at work I tend to get more stress and because of the ADD, plus the stress, things started to get messy already. My Boss was loosing his patience and my work is deteriorating. My inattention and lack of focus especially are holding me back. I need to acknowledge the symptoms so that I can deal with them better.
ADD is not supposed to be an excuse but I guess it explains many things if not to others at least to myself....
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